Do you think being gay is a choice?

The pastor of a Rockdale County megachurch has publicly announced he is gay.

"I know a lot of straight people think it is a choice. It is not," says Jim Swilley. The 52-year-old founded the church 25 years ago. He seemed the stereotypical picture of a pastor, with four kids and a wife who doubled as his associate pastor. But Swilley said he's known he was gay since he was little boy. He said his wife, Debye, also knew his secret from the start.

He says he's received support from many in his congregation, but at least one conservative Christian blog has called him sick, twisted, unclean and an instrument of the devil. "I know all the hateful stuff that's being written about me online, whatever," Swilley said. "To think about saving a teenager yeah, I'll risk my reputation for that."

Do you think being gay is a choice? Do you think this pastor is courageous or a hypocrite?

Tags: choice, gay

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Permalink Reply by Martin on November 2, 2010 at 1:35am

Every gay person that I have ever known has asserted that homosexuality is not a choice.

Many have suffered in denial for years, many have been subjected to hatred and rejection by the ignorant.

Nobody would choose that.

This pastor would only be a hypocrite if he had denounced homosexuality whilst being fully aware of his own sexuality. He has taken the risk, and I hope it works out well for him and his family.

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Permalink Reply by Kevin on November 2, 2010 at 10:01am

Gay = The way you are born
Intolerant Idiot = A conscious choice

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Permalink Reply by Alyssa Roman on November 2, 2010 at 2:28pm

Honestly, this is a difficult subject for me. I don't fully understand what people mean when they say to be gay is not a choice. Humans like to think that they have a choice in most matters, so I don't see why sexual orientation is different. Specially something like sexual attraction, which doesn't fully develop until puberty... how can you know you're born gay or straight? Shouldn't that be determined at your first crush or sexual feeling? Maybe there is gene for it, but people aren't directly aware of their genetic makeup. Maybe it's environment, growing up a certain way may make you more likely to be gay... still we wouldn't be aware of that. And we would have to be aware of it to claim that we were born this way with no choice in the matter. What we are aware of are our choices!

I'm bisexual, so maybe it's different for me. But I very much feel like I chose to be bisexual.This does not mean that I drunkingly made out with a girl one night and decided to never stop. It just means that chose to pay attention to how pretty girls can be, I chose to explore and experiment, and one day I decided to be bisexual. I didn't feel like I was revealing my true self to the world. I felt like I was making an exciting choice for myself.

I feel like saying it's not a choice takes that away from me. And I feel like people use the idea that "GAY IS NOT A CHOICE" to help the gay community escape persecution. We should not be persecuted for the right to choose who we want to love anyways! I understand that many gay people feel they were born that way and maybe the were, I respect that. But I, as a member of the gay community, feel I made a decision and that should also be respected. If saying, "I can't help it! I was born this way!" is the only way to be accepted... than this world is more screwed up than I thought.

These are merely my thoughts on the topic and also my personal experience. I definitely feel like I'm missing the perspective of a gay person who feels they were born that way, so please share it with me.

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Permalink Reply by Todd Huffine on November 2, 2010 at 3:06pm

When can people just be people? What does it matter what each person prefers sexually? What makes someone gay or straight? Say I choose to tell a lie today. Does this make me a liar for the rest of my life? I may be inclined to want to lie all the time but restrain myself from committing the act. Does this save me from the label of liar? Just as someone may be attracted towards someone of the same sex but chooses not to act on it. Does this, then, mean they are not gay? Imagine the other side of the coin. What if someone is sexually attracted to the opposite sex but choses to be with people of the same sex. Does the choice become the label, or the true nature of the person? When does the label become relevant?

I feel that when a gay person says they were born gay, they are describing that their natural sexual desires lean towards the same sex. Just as I do not feel as though I chose to be straight. Even though I do not have the same desires as a gay man, I can see that my desires are unique to myself. Therefore I cannot deny that each individuals natural desires are their own and may be completely different than my own. This applies to sexuality and all forms of identity.

Ultimately I feel that the romantic, sexual love we constantly strive for strains our ability to feel and display love towards all people at all times. Love is abundant. Sharing it with only one other is, I feel, a great mistake; gay or straight.

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Permalink Reply by James Kay on December 13, 2010 at 1:50am

I don't personally think anyone actively choose to be gay or straight. Many of the gay people I know do exhibit a lot of other psychopathology but some do not. This is also true of many of the straight people I know. So that's no real answer either.

Having a degree in Biology, I also know that many mammal species, if given unlimited food resources but limited living space, will expand their numbers until overcrowding is massive and then a huge amount of male homosexual activity will appear as a natural consequence.